Thursday, February 11, 2010

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Jessica Dikdan.

EDIT* Wow i completely forgot two essential parts in my sketch (the bubble and the vomit) so I did a quick fix. thank you Justin for reminding me. Sorry bout that!


  1. Right off the bat, i think there needs to be some suggestion of vomit...

    is the little girl arresting him? or is she looking past him? i just think there needs to be one more contextual clue to tie all the imagery together.

    otherwise its just as funny was your previous sketch. i really enjoy this.

  2. i think the shadows here are working really well on the figures, but i feel like the environment needs more black. Maybe you could go like really frank miller with a totally black wall and like really white vomit, or maybe even just a spotlight, or dramatic shadowing on the wall.

    Either way though, I think that the vomit might need to be highlighted more in some way because it's really what the piece is about, yeah?

    also just a compositional note, where the wall meets the ground and the fold in the girl's pants are like riiight on the same line, maybe just move it up a tad?

  3. I think you should do the vomit black, so it would be more appreciable. And also, I think that the wall corner should be more in the drawing than in the edge of the drawing.

  4. I'm really liking how your dealing with the figures, I would definitely try and have that contrast reflected in the environment as well.

    And as Michelle pointed out the cropping on the left side is a little weird. I would just get rid of that vertical.

    Of course as everyone else has already stated, that vomit definitely needs more prescence.

  5. I agree with what's been said about emphasizing the vom a little more in this. It sounds like it was a last minute addition, but more black would still help to bring it out more. Or I like Michelle's suggestion of a black wall with white vomit to make it really stand out --maybe even reversing all the values you have now? (making everything that's white, black, and vice versa) It just seems like there is a lot of white overall.

    and i love the concept, it's hilarious.

  6. Yea this is a really cool piece and I think it has a lot of potential. The wrinkles and shadows in the cloths are really well don, but I agree that you should emphasize the vomit and the background with some more negative spaces. Maybe some bricks or something?

  7. I think once you fix the vomit it will be done. The figures look really good!

  8. I agree, I know it was kind of a last-minute fix but the vomit could definitely use more shadows or darks, something to make it especially grotesque cause it's pretty important to the piece. Also, the text in the bubbles seems a little weird and/or irrelevant the way it's written - maybe if you wrote it in a kind of "little-kiddish" style? I don't know. I think you should add shadows coming out from under Ronald and the little girl cause it looks like they're floating in space a little bit. Otherwise, It's a great funny piece!