I like where the rain clouds are you changed the contrast of the rain, I think it gives the work a nice deign feel to it. I am not completely sure what is happening, possibly make the intent of the work clearer?
I definitely agree that the patterning of the rain is great, but I also agrew with Deming in that I don't really understand what's happening. Is she sitting on a raincloud? Is she an umbrella?
I like the figure of the doctor and women. And since I saw the sketch of this piece, I could get what is going on. But I think women should have more clear gesture with her arms. It took me some time to get her elbows. I also like the clouds and rain. so cool
I understood the narrative (though it didn't hurt that I saw your previous piece) perhaps the clouds are causing some confusion; while the stormy clouds may reflect her mood they don't really make me think of hospitals or laying eggs. I like how the clouds transform the space and add texture but maybe it would be stronger with another motif in place. You did a great job of converting the sketch to high contrast shapes, especially since your last piece was so reliant on line.
I think the shapes and silhouettes are used well to define the characters . I do understand that she's holding her face crying and the rain clouds reflect that, but I am confused as to why she's on a cloud with a doctor below her. I agree with Lara that a hospital setting of some kind would make the piece clearer.
Cool illustration! I really like the idea and composition. Also gestures of the figure give interesting movement to the piece. The pattern of the rain and cloud in the background are nice too. It would be better to give clearer form the the woman since I can barely see her hands.
The people are done really well and so is the background, but like most others i am confused about how the setting interacts with the people. Otherwise its really awesome
I really like the people and i remember from your last piece that you had a distinct atmosphere without having a definate space but i'm a little confused about the atmosphere in this one. The rain clouds plus the woman's position makes it look like she's depressed (and she looks like the girl from the ring which is just awesome) but floating. And even though it's funny, it also is unclear exactly why her egg baby is shooting directly into the doctor's face. I really like the concepts though!
I'm not quite sure what's happening in the picture, but I do like how the raindrops are white in front of the clouds then black below them. The clouds are nice as well!
Nice use of lighting on the doctor and I really like how you used the arrow and and rain drops as directional queues, her bent arms do get a little lost though and kinda look like breasts a bit, maybe move them little or shape them differently? Aside from that, good job!
I like the idea and the arrow definitely helps illustrate the piece. I am confused as to if the woman is floating because if she is that's kind of odd. I'm no sure how you could do this but maybe show her sitting on something.
this is really good. I like the choice of blacking out both of thier faces so the focus is in the middle on the egg like it should be. I personally like the first piece you did but this works well also. The only thing that kinda bothers me is the thickness of the arrow. i liked how thin it was in your first project.
This really looks great, though I was certainly confused at first. I think maybe decreasing the amount of black in the egg would make it more obvious immediately. I'm not sure how I feel about the arrow, but I understand the necessity within this piece.
Jee Shaun-- I think this is a lovely image, but a less successful "illustration" than the last. Its hard not to compare them because this isnt really a different image or a different sketch, just a different version of the same original thumbnail ( i know its one of the final sketches you submitted, but you understand what i mean right? Its not really a leap from the others). I think the other image was more successful compositionally, design wise and in terms of getting the narrative across (which is why you chose the other version of that narrative to begin with, right?).
So moving forward--- I dont like the arrow. It's too "tell not show" (in other words, you are telling us "something is coming out and its going this direction" as opposed to "what do you think is happening with this egg?"). I would re-think this a little. And while it may be a slight variation on the assignment i gave out, it may be in your best interest, and a much more interesting use of your time, to come up wit a new prompt-- or to look back at your abandoned Thumbnails and choose a different narrative altogether. If you DO want to keep this basic idea, i think the clouds need to read as clouds and the egg should be something else-- what would be more relevant to rain and clouds? it makes "sense" that a dr would be confused birthing a chicken egg from a pregnant woman; but a woman in the clouds, in the rain, giving birth to an egg... ? its too random.
If it were my piece, i'd re-imagine the image in general. If you come up with something new before final, post it here and email me; i'll check it out! Dana
She should have chicken wings...no feathers. I think that would be hilarious. Maybe you could have like a dozen eggs shooting out of her in a line instead of the arrow. Anyway, nice job on the piece, I likes.
Great suggestion of texture and use of those clouds to tie together space. They do seem a bit randomly spread, though, perhaps using them more to emphasize the motion of the piece would be better.
I like where the rain clouds are you changed the contrast of the rain, I think it gives the work a nice deign feel to it. I am not completely sure what is happening, possibly make the intent of the work clearer?
ReplyDeleteI definitely agree that the patterning of the rain is great, but I also agrew with Deming in that I don't really understand what's happening. Is she sitting on a raincloud? Is she an umbrella?
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteI like the figure of the doctor and women. And since I saw the sketch of this piece, I could get what is going on. But I think women should have more clear gesture with her arms. It took me some time to get her elbows. I also like the clouds and rain. so cool
ReplyDeleteI understood the narrative (though it didn't hurt that I saw your previous piece) perhaps the clouds are causing some confusion; while the stormy clouds may reflect her mood they don't really make me think of hospitals or laying eggs. I like how the clouds transform the space and add texture but maybe it would be stronger with another motif in place. You did a great job of converting the sketch to high contrast shapes, especially since your last piece was so reliant on line.
ReplyDeleteI think the shapes and silhouettes are used well to define the characters . I do understand that she's holding her face crying and the rain clouds reflect that, but I am confused as to why she's on a cloud with a doctor below her. I agree with Lara that a hospital setting of some kind would make the piece clearer.
ReplyDeleteCool illustration! I really like the idea and composition. Also gestures of the figure give interesting movement to the piece. The pattern of the rain and cloud in the background are nice too. It would be better to give clearer form the the woman since I can barely see her hands.
ReplyDeleteThe people are done really well and so is the background, but like most others i am confused about how the setting interacts with the people. Otherwise its really awesome
ReplyDeleteI really like the people and i remember from your last piece that you had a distinct atmosphere without having a definate space but i'm a little confused about the atmosphere in this one. The rain clouds plus the woman's position makes it look like she's depressed (and she looks like the girl from the ring which is just awesome) but floating. And even though it's funny, it also is unclear exactly why her egg baby is shooting directly into the doctor's face. I really like the concepts though!
ReplyDeletei like how you handled the light, its very dramatic. the pattern you created with the rain is cool and the clouds break up the white space nicely.
ReplyDeleteI'm not quite sure what's happening in the picture, but I do like how the raindrops are white in front of the clouds then black below them. The clouds are nice as well!
ReplyDeleteNice use of lighting on the doctor and I really like how you used the arrow and and rain drops as directional queues, her bent arms do get a little lost though and kinda look like breasts a bit, maybe move them little or shape them differently? Aside from that, good job!
ReplyDeleteI like the idea and the arrow definitely helps illustrate the piece. I am confused as to if the woman is floating because if she is that's kind of odd. I'm no sure how you could do this but maybe show her sitting on something.
ReplyDeletethis is really good. I like the choice of blacking out both of thier faces so the focus is in the middle on the egg like it should be. I personally like the first piece you did but this works well also. The only thing that kinda bothers me is the thickness of the arrow. i liked how thin it was in your first project.
ReplyDeleteThis really looks great, though I was certainly confused at first. I think maybe decreasing the amount of black in the egg would make it more obvious immediately. I'm not sure how I feel about the arrow, but I understand the necessity within this piece.
ReplyDeleteJee Shaun-- I think this is a lovely image, but a less successful "illustration" than the last. Its hard not to compare them because this isnt really a different image or a different sketch, just a different version of the same original thumbnail ( i know its one of the final sketches you submitted, but you understand what i mean right? Its not really a leap from the others). I think the other image was more successful compositionally, design wise and in terms of getting the narrative across (which is why you chose the other version of that narrative to begin with, right?).
ReplyDeleteSo moving forward--- I dont like the arrow. It's too "tell not show" (in other words, you are telling us "something is coming out and its going this direction" as opposed to "what do you think is happening with this egg?"). I would re-think this a little. And while it may be a slight variation on the assignment i gave out, it may be in your best interest, and a much more interesting use of your time, to come up wit a new prompt-- or to look back at your abandoned Thumbnails and choose a different narrative altogether. If you DO want to keep this basic idea, i think the clouds need to read as clouds and the egg should be something else-- what would be more relevant to rain and clouds? it makes "sense" that a dr would be confused birthing a chicken egg from a pregnant woman; but a woman in the clouds, in the rain, giving birth to an egg... ? its too random.
If it were my piece, i'd re-imagine the image in general.
If you come up with something new before final, post it here and email me; i'll check it out!
Dana
Oh man, I want see like 30 of these!
ReplyDeleteStill reads, still funny, still fits the assignment.
I'm not sure if this fits any better than the last one, though. I think I'd like it more if it were more compact?
She should have chicken wings...no feathers. I think that would be hilarious. Maybe you could have like a dozen eggs shooting out of her in a line instead of the arrow. Anyway, nice job on the piece, I likes.
ReplyDeleteGreat suggestion of texture and use of those clouds to tie together space. They do seem a bit randomly spread, though, perhaps using them more to emphasize the motion of the piece would be better.
ReplyDelete