The story is of a scared spaceman stranded on the moon.
beginning: the Spaceman is awoken by what he thinks are monsters
middle: the Spaceman fears or his life as the monsters go in to grab him.
he shortly after realizes that the monsters are not monsters at all, and are there to help.
end: the spaceman is assisted by the friendly creatures he once believed to be monsters, and is able to reach his planet.
The look i was going for was hard to get with pencils, and since it was going to be uploaded on the blog I decided too do my sketch digitally. However, the final is going to be in full color(i was thinking gouache.)
The look and style you achieved is really interesting and it'll be even cooler when its in full color
ReplyDeletei like the graphic style. i think you could alter the middle piece because as of right now it is slightly difficult to read what is happening
ReplyDeletei love your characters! very cool. the layout you chose really lends itself to the subject matter, i like the tall skinny panels next to one another. i would also say to change the second panel. Technically you've made this into four panels, and it's not really necessary. If you moved the top part down to make the layout more like the first panel, it'd be easier to understand.
ReplyDeleteThis is so cool! I love the little space man. I don't know why there is a bed in the middle of nowhere, but it doesn't matter. I don't think the extra piece in the second panel is necessary to understand the story but I don't think it makes it difficult to read either. I wouldn't change anything.
ReplyDeleteI really like the sharp but flat style you have going here. I'm very curious as to what colors you're planning on using and what medium you'll use.
ReplyDeleteI'm a little confused though, because I thought these were supposed to be pencil sketches? I may be mistaken, perhaps I read something wrong on the assignment sheet.
Other than that I love the narrative and the story is shown well through the piece; I completely understand without even having to read your descriptions.
The characters are great, their shape really helps create an interesting flowing composition. I also like the animation to the bed, how it changes shape with the emotion of the spaceman. I like how crisp it is right now, and the values you have. The narrative is strong and I can understand it without the help of your description. I think it will be really interesting and catching in color.
ReplyDeletei think the gouache is a good choice and the cut paper look from it would translate well from digital. i think you should do a little more transition in scale on the figure though. consider zooming in and out to give some drama to the story
ReplyDeleteIt is nuts that a stranded spaceman would have a bed. that is really confusing and really interrupts the narrative for me. even if he wasn't stranded and just lived there... still... JUST a bed? nothing else?
ReplyDeletehow about a broken down space ship? maybe the monsters fix his space ship for him.
anyway, great graphic style. digital would probably be the best medium for this, but I don't know if we are allowed to do that. gouache would work, but maybe you could consider some kind of collage. that way you could still get these flat shapes, but they could have some kind of texture. I don't know. something to think about maybe?
The lay out is great and I think the use of Guache is a good choice for that kind of look. My only concern is the man getting back to his own planet, until I read your write up I didn't know he was going home. Maybe show a welcome home banner or his planet a bit larger in the final. Otherwise looking good.
ReplyDeletei would say your whole narrative is great and will turn out really well in color. i have one tiny complaint: make the space man look horrified at the top of the second panel. He's barely holding himself and just has a slightly worried look. if he thinks hes about to be killed by some giant mountain people he should be sh***ing his pants on that bed (figuratively). It has a great mood overall and i think the simplicity of that last panel works really well.
ReplyDeleteWow Mohamed, I am really hard pressed to find something i don't like about this piece. I would argue that it was not done with pencil, but there are some qualities in this that i feel you would have not achieved without the digital production; such as the imperfect placement of the white separator in the second panel.
ReplyDeleteYour idea is really well communicated with the gestures in each panel and i 'm really excited to see how this turns out in gauche.
I think my only critical comment can be that i agree with Jason that the idea of the space man going home is a little fuzzy. I feel like making him smaller might clear this up, as his body size would be easier to relate the size of the planet.
I like the way you've handled the simple style a lot. It's really effective, the characters and 'medium' work really well together.
ReplyDeleteI think the narrative is cute as well. The only thing I would say is that my eye wants to read it as one big image so i find myself following the line of the 'monsters' across the three pieces instead of seeing it as a time based work.
Can't wait to see this done though.
You always seem to create some really imaginative and interesting characters. So good work on that. I think the piece really reads well. I'm glad that you added that strip on the second panel. The graphical works well so gouache is definitely a good choice. I remember you saying you didn't like to work with gouache that much last week. How big do you plan to go with each piece? Getting that sky can be difficult if you make your piece too big, but its definitely doable.
ReplyDeleteman, i wish we could work digitally its KILLING ME. this is cool and simple, really digging it. I don't think that split is necessary though in the second one, kind of redundant.
ReplyDelete